There was this post on my Dash today about graduating, trying to find a job and ending up either unemployed or at McDonalds.
It nearly made me crack up, although I’m in the fortunate position to be at work right now and to receive a decent salary (not from McDonalds btw).
The way to this job, however, was so bloody painful. It’s hard to put it into words.
The job itself is… well, can I complain? I only have to work 8 ½ hours a day and can stay comfy at home during the weekends. The job itself is so easy and non-challenging that I can find enough time to read books, explore the Internet and do other stuff non-work-related stuff.
No one here bothers.
Yet, I’m unhappy as hell, while everyone says I should be glad and happy.
I have two university degrees. I graduated with the best marks and was so proud and happy of what I have achieved. My essays, my graduation thesis… I loved it and even now I still think I accomplished something good there.
Yet, I couldn’t get into the position I wanted. Now I ended up as an “order scheduler” (as my British, insensitive colleague once called me).
And it wears me down so much. I sometimes sit at home for hours just staring holes into the air. I’m too tired to meet friends, too tired to even switch on my PS3, too tired to answer mails.
And then there are all these things I want to do. I want to write stories, not only fan fiction, but my own stories. I want to organize role-playing events. I want to do something creative. And although I’m full of ideas, I’m not able to get them out.
But at least I can now afford taking riding lessons two times a week.
And at least I get my feelings written down today.